Better Days
by DeadPoet0712
Summary: Charlie Dalton returns to school after the holiday break. None of the poets are the same and he is determined to fix them. Especially the one that goes by Knox. Oneshot. Rated T for language, mentions of death and boy romance.


Better Days

Oneshot

**Disclaimer: I do not own the Dead Poets Society. If I did, would I be writing this? Although, I'm pretty sure I'm coining the term 'Choxy' so that would be mine. If not, I guess I borrowed it.**

**A/N: I got this idea from both my love for Charlie/Knox and watching the most beautiful DPS video on youtube. If you want to see it, just search for "Dead Poets Society, Better Days." I think the song works really well for something they all want. Simply just better days are what all the poets are after. This is set after Neil's death and Charlie didn't get expelled. I hope you enjoy it and take the time to review.**

_And you ask me what I want this year  
And I try to make this kind and clear  
Just a chance that maybe we'll find better days  
Cuz I don't need boxes wrapped in strings  
And desire and love and empty things  
Just a chance that maybe we'll find better days_

So take these words  
And sing out loud  
Cuz everyone is forgiven now  
Cuz tonight's the night the world begins again

And it's someplace simple where we could live  
And something only you can give  
And that's faith and trust and peace while we're alive  
And the one poor child that saved this world  
And there's 10 million more who probably could  
If we all just stopped and said a prayer for them

As Charlie Dalton lay on his new bed in his new dorm assignment, he stared up at the ceiling. He wasn't sleeping again but that was something he was growing used to. The dark was starting to comfort him in ways he didn't know possible. It worried him yet comforted him all at the same time. As the minutes rolled by, his thoughts drifted back to three weeks ago, the day he had made his return to Welton Academy.

When Charlie Dalton had thought that the winter break would help the poets with Neil's death he had been completely and horribly wrong. After they arrived back things just seemed so much worse for the lot of them. The freezing, snowy, dreary weather hadn't cleared up by the day they got back. No, it hung around like a constant reminder of Neil turning his back on the world that one fateful night. His father's car pulled up into the front drive of the school and came to a stop for him to get out. Without a word, the only Dalton heir exited the backseat of the family car, went to the trunk and grabbed the suitcase he had brought home with him for the holidays. He stood on the steps of the school that had turned even more into a prison as he watched his mother and father drive away, leaving him there with his memories that haunted him night and day. He exhaled shakily and ran a hand through his hair as he tried to gather himself to go inside.

_With suitcase in hand, Charlie turned around to face the wide opened doors. The boys were arriving at different times. Some, a day or two ahead, others waiting until the last moment. He just had the rest of the afternoon and night left until classes started the next morning for the new semester. Before he could do anything else he had to report to Nolan. They weren't going to let him continue to room with Cameron after their "incident." At least there was something good to come out of all of this. _

_Three staircases and one hundred steps later he found himself in the familiar office. The same office where he went for when he was in trouble, to be paddled, to be forced to sign Keating's death sentence. Swallowing, he stood in front of Nolan's chair for his instructions. Minutes later he wished he had been rooming with Cameron._

"_You want me to what?" Charlie hissed._

_Nolan nodded. "You heard me, Mr. Dalton. You are to room with Anthony Anderson for the remainder of the school year."_

_Charlie breathed in deeply and slowly as he tried to hold back the million thoughts rushing through his mind. "Mr. Nolan…isn't there anywhere else I can go?" he asked._

_For a moment, it seemed as if Nolan had actually cared. His eyes grew soft for a second until they went back to their usually hardness. "I'm sorry but no. You are just going to have to take Mr. Perry's side of the dorm."_

_Those simple instructions plunged Charlie into an even deeper hell. He was sleeping where his best friend slept. He was using the same closet, the same desk and same heater. No one could replace Neil Perry but it sure as hell felt like they were trying._

Charlie rolled over onto his stomach and looked over at Todd's sleeping form. He was having sleeping problems too. Most likely, he had it worse off than anyone else. The two of them had grown extremely close and then he was gone. Finally it seemed he was too exhausted and his body finally gave him a break. Charlie closed his eyes as he tried to get rid of the thought that the mattress literally smelled like Neil had. Like fresh air, the forest and that cologne Charlie had convinced him to get because it would drive girls mad. It had to be all in his imagination. It had to. Neil had been gone for far too long to let that linger around. Again, his thoughts began to wander back to recent memories.

"_Hey, Todd," Charlie greeted quietly in the doorway of his new dorm._

_Todd looked up from his bed with bloodshot eyes. He had been sleep deprived since Neil's death and from being so exhausted he would cry from time to time. "Hey, Charlie."_

_Charlie cleared his throat and stepped inside with his things. "Nolan…uh, he…"_

_The other boy nodded. "I know," he said with his voice cracking._

"_Oh." At least that would make it easier than having to explain. Charlie walked inside and set up his desk with his school things first in silence. When that was over with he began settling his things into the small closet that was provided. "How was your break?" he asked to fill the silence._

"_How was yours?" Todd shot back and Charlie cringed._

"_Yeah. I figured as much." Charlie finished with the closet and stowed his bags away. He turned to the bed and froze. There was a new pillow there and the mattress had been made up by one of the workers. He cleared his throat and instead of going there, he perched up on the windowsill, above the heater instead. It felt wrong to be invading any space that used to be Neil's._

_Charlie stared out the window as Todd stared over at the newly made bed in silence. After a while, he couldn't take it anymore and he broke the silence. "Damn it, Todd. He wouldn't want us to be like this. He'd want us to be…happy. He'd want us to be the way we were."_

_Todd shrugged. "Things will never be the same."_

"_I know but…we could at least try to make them normal again."_

"_How Charlie? This whole place whispers of Neil." The whispers were enough to drive anyone mad._

_Charlie leaned his head back against the wall and stared up at the ceiling. "I dunno, Todd. I dunno. I just want…better days."_

Charlie flopped over onto his right side to try and get more comfortable. He snuggled further into his mattress, keeping his dull eyes closed still. Todd was easy enough to room with. He was usually pretty quiet and kept to himself. Until the nightmares hit him and then Charlie had to rush over to wake him up, to calm him down from the sobs that wracked his body and to hold him. The more time went on, the longer it seemed Todd's whole world fell apart.

And then there was Meeks and Pitts.

_Charlie wandered down towards the lake. It was still overcast but it had stopped snowing long enough to where you could stand to be outside. His feet took him to the frozen dock and he found two of the poets there. He plopped down beside them, their feet dangling over the ledge above the unmoving water._

"_What are you guys doing?" he asked as a greeting._

_Pitts continued to stare out at the lake in silence while Meeks turned to face him. "Nothing, Charlie. Absolutely nothing."_

_Charlie frowned. The two of them had always been up to something before. Whether it was studying, plotting a new experiment or working on their radio. "What do you mean 'nothing'?"_

"_What do I mean nothing? Charlie, you have eyes. Use them!" Meeks nearly cried out._

_Usually the two of them could banter back and forth so easily. Now it was more strained and caused problems then anything else. Charlie swallowed. He was going to have to be more careful. "What about that radio?"_

"_What about it?"_

"_The last time I heard, you found a spot where you got the signal." When all Meeks did was shrug he continued on. "Don't you wanna find it again?" Break the rules, Meeksy. Damn it, do something against the conformity of it! _

"_There isn't a point."_

"_What? Of course there's a point!"_

"_Like what?" Meeks sighed. Pitts still hadn't said a word. He was almost as bad as Todd was now._

"_Like…" Charlie paused long enough to stand up. "Like sticking it to the man like the two of you used to! It'd be better than lounging around on your asses all day! Build a better one. One where you can get the signal from anywhere in the school! Just fucking do something!" he shouted._

_By now both Meeks and Pitts were staring at the raggedly breathing boy before them. Charlie was a mess not to be reckoned with. "Maybe…maybe in a few days or something, Charlie."_

"_When they're better?"_

"_Yeah. When they're better."_

_With nothing else to say Charlie Dalton stormed off and back to his room._

Charlie groaned quietly to himself and rolled over onto his right side. None of the poets even talked to Cameron. They didn't even look at him if they had to. He was a traitor and traitors had a right to be burned. Out of all the boys Charlie was worried about one of them the most. That boy just happened to be his other best friend Knox Overstreet.

_No need to say a greeting, Charlie sat down beside Knox on one of the benches in the courtyard. They had a free period and he had disappeared so he had gone looking for him. A light snow was falling around them, sending chills along their young bodies but it was being ignored. The two sat in comfortable silence for a while before Charlie felt the need to say something._

"_How'd it go last night, Knoxious?" he questioned with his petname._

_Knox's gazed dropped down to the snow around his feet. "Horrible."_

"_What happened?"_

_Knox shrugged and rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. "It just wasn't the same."_

"_Are you kidding me, Knox? You had been after Chris for months. You finally got her and you…let her go?" Charlie asked in shock. Knox's nodded spurred him on to ask why._

_Knox licked his lips before managing a response. "The thrill of the chase was gone, I guess." Neil had always been encouraging him when the others had just laughed. Neil had been a huge driving force behind the future relationship and now it felt strangely empty to be with her._

_Charlie sighed slowly. "She reminds you, doesn't she?"_

_Knox nodded. "Too much."_

_Charlie closed his eyes for a few moments in thought. "She was pretty, though."_

"_Extremely."_

"_It's too bad."_

"_Yeah. Right now, it just isn't a good time."_

"_Another day?"_

"_Yeah. When things are better. New."_

Charlie's eyes snapped open and he stared up at the dark ceiling once more. Knox was starting to bother him even more than Neil does. Knox had always been the goofy romantic. Now he trudged along with the others, that spark in his eye gone. It was eating away at what was left over of his heart. Knox Overstreet had been defeated and that had never happened before. Sure, he'd been upset and hurt before. But not…completely destroyed. Now he was definitely not going to sleep and he had a test tomorrow. Oh well. Screw it. He had to fix this. Before anyone else his best friend needed the attention. He could work on the others later.

Pulling on his robe and slipping on his slippers, he snuck out of his dorm and almost silently down the hall. The only sound to be heard was the quiet swishing of his robe as he moved. Knox's roommate was stuck in the infirmary with the flu or something so it was the perfect time to confront him. Charlie entered the other dorm and shut the door behind him. Knox was sitting up at his desk, reading from one of their textbooks.

"Late night studying? That's so unlike you, Knoxious," he said.

Knox looked up from his history book and shut it, pushing it to the side of his desk. "Visits this late from you are pretty unlikely well," he pointed out.

Charlie shrugged and sat down on the edge of the bed. The two stared at each other for a while as they observed the other. Knox's hair was mussed from trying to sleep. His complexion was more pallor than normal and the circles under his eyes were getting worse. This tugged at his heartstrings. Somehow, he was going to have to make things right again. None of them deserved this. "You look like shit," Charlie said bluntly.

The ghost of a smile turned up the corners of Knox's lips. "I could say the same for you." He stretched his arms above his head, his shirt rising ever so slightly with his movements.

"Yeah, at least I can make any work look."

Knox snorted. "Oh, that's right. You're Charles Dalton."

"No. I'm Nuwanda," he said nonchalantly.

Knox froze and his jaw clenched. None of them had spoken that name since Neil's death. Now Charlie was saying it so open and freely. It reminded them all of the better times in the cave. Of nights and afternoons spent in dreaming and wonder. "Y-Yeah. Nuwanda," he breathed.

"I'm worried about you, you know."

"I figured."

"You've gotta snap out of it, Knox."

"So do you."

"You first. I've gotta be looking after the rest of you, don't I?" Charlie reminded.

Knox ran a hand through his hair. "I guess so." Neil and Charlie had always been their unofficial official leaders and he was the one left to pick up the pieces.

"What do you need, Knox?"

Knox closed his eyes for a moment as he thought about it. "I want things to…go back to normal." They couldn't sneak out to the cave anymore. That was for sure. "Maybe…maybe we could get the guys to agree to one of the abandoned classrooms or something." Things could maybe feel a little better then. Charlie nodded in agreement so he continued. "I just…can't feel anymore, Charlie."

Charlie sat up straighter. "Feel? Feel what?" he asked wearily.

"Anything. My emotions just seem to be gone." At least any of the good ones.

Charlie licked his lips as he surveyed him. He had always had strong feelings for Knox. One could even say they went past friendship. He loved Knox. Not in the brotherly or friend kind of way. This one was deeper. It was almost like a soul mate brand. "Can you think of something to fix it?" he asked.

The other boy shrugged. "I dunno. I've tried."

"There's one thing you haven't tried."

"What's that?"

Charlie hesitated. This could royally screw things up even worse than they already were but he had to try something. He couldn't just wait around for things to get better anymore. Charlie had to take action. Carpe diem…even if it killed him. "This."

The boy who had professed himself as Nuwanda leaned forward the small distance. He placed his hand on the back of Knox's neck and helped pull him into a forceful kiss. If Knox wanted to feel again then he was going to make that happened. Knox's first reaction was to tense up. Then after a moment, his lips began to hesitantly move against the others. The force of the kiss toned down as the minutes passed until it was gentle and sweet. Charlie pulled back and the two locked eyes.

"Did that work?" Charlie asked breathlessly.

Knox took a bit to gather how he was feeling and he nodded. "Somehow it did."

Charlie grinned his first true grin in a long time. "Good." He leaned back in and kissed Knox again. Knox joined him on the bed and they lay there together, reveling in the way it felt to be touched and to feel again. When enough time had passed and they grew tired, Charlie pulled the blankets over them and they snuggled into the mattress together.

"How are you feeling, Knoxy?" Charlie asked. That nickname had always been reserved for when the two had been alone. It showed the more intimate side of their relationship.

"Better. Much, much better," he confessed.

Charlie grinned again and pressed one last kiss to his lips before settling into his pillow. From one simple action, their world was starting again. Neil would never be forgotten but they had to cope and together they could. As the two drifted into sleep, Charlie mused over the results of such a simple way to comfort someone. By doing so, he had just guaranteed them better days and he wouldn't have it any other way.

**A/N: I wrote this story with no direction in mind. I just wanted to do it. I hope the ending was good enough because I just knew they needed better days.**


End file.
